Weekend movie

I watched Sex and the City last weekend. With some of my friends. We’d always been following the series and the thought of watching it back to back (and not just for 20 mins a day) was all the reason we needed to watch the movie (None of us own the DVD series yet). So I pretty much juggled work that day so that I could leave on time. Knowing Blore’s legendary traffic woes especially on a Friday evening, I had no choice but to leave almost 2 hours before the movie was scheduled to begin. Reaching the multiplex, my friend and I were about to dig into some yummy chaat in the multiplex’s food complex, when our other friend called to tell us she’s running late and had not picked up the tickets. Whattt? I left work early to see others go past me for the movie??? Some frantic calls and 25 mins of standing in the queue, we got our tickets. Phew! Ran upstairs, literally gobbled some food, squeezed oursleves in the lift that had women and more women all heading to watch the same movie and found that we’d be sitting right in the first row! Gandhi class if you may!

We loved the movie. Totally. It delivered what it promised. Women, men problems, sex, marriage, style, fashion, emotions (over the top of course!!) and love, love, love, love.  There were some priceless moments that left us in splits.  There’s something so relatable to such movies, serials and books. On some level, you connect. And laugh. That’s the best part Go watch it if you already haven’t.

The 10K run

Bangalore hosted the Sunfeast World 10K run yesterday. After last minute registrations (a part of the registration money goes to charity), we successfully got our run numbers. There were over 15,000 people participating! Hubby dear had been training for a week by jogging in the mornings. Three friends had been gymming everyday. I seemed like the only one not concerned about training (though I did join hubby on one morning for a jog). The reason for this is very simple. I’m not a morning person especially for something I’m not very keen on. Also there was this sheer over confidence that I would be able to do this since I have done some good distance treks earlier (and this run was not even uphill). I know, it probably doesn’t make sense to connect them! I’d never done any kinda activity that involved running (except in high school when I was into ‘high jump’, you had to run a bit for that!). Thankfully I got a useful tip that jogging for 5-7 minutes and then walking for a minute really helps. And that’s what I did, except that I jogged for 3 minutes and walked for a minute. Halfway through, it started getting lesser, I was jogging for 2 minutes, walking for 2 and so on. Finally it was a 1 minute jog and a 2 minute walk. It was blistering hot, but it felt good to do this. It was my first marathon and I completed it In 98 minutes flat. I did have a target: to finish within 120 minutes (I had a bet with my friend and also you wouldn’t get a participation certificate if you finished later). Well, I reached my target. I did it. All that sweating, huffing and puffing was worth it. The sweet tast of success, eh? 

 I think the winner of the Open run clocked 22 minutes. The day earlier, we all did some shopping, bought some running gear…all of us were quite excited really. After the run, we were all very tired and what better way to relax than head for a buffet brunch with unlimitied alcohol. We indulged and how! Ate and drank for over 4 hours. The lil’ bit of fat I’d have hopefully lost in the run, I’m sure I gained that twice (maybe trhice) over after the brunch. All of us were totally pasted at the end of it. Had to drag ourselves home…and once we hit the bed, we forgot the world. A fitful 11 hours of sleep. Hubby dear surpassed me for once in this regard, he slept for 15 hours straight!! You know, there’s nothing like the sleep of exhaustion and satisfaction.

We spent quite a bit of money yesterday, on the registration (this was the least and we did get a goodie bag in return as well), the clothes, the brunch (most expensive)…but as they say in the MasterCard ad, all that was just money, the sense of achievement and indulgence is truly priceless We had a super day. And I’m quite proud of what we did yesterday…hurray!

 

Mum’s the word!

I don’t really believe in all these 21st century created ‘days’. Like Friendship Day, Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Sister’s Day, so on and so forth. We had survived (no, thrived) before all these. But after their import from the West, all the greeting card stores, the restaurants, the gift shops thrived and how. Why do I need one particular day of the year to celebrate love, or friendship? Also I’ve always believed that doing something for anyone should be done when they least expect it. When it’s not an occasion. When you turn an ordinary day into a special day, no?

 Not that anything has changed in what I think about this, but a few years ago, on Mother’s Day, I’d gone for a wedding. On the way back, my friend stopped off to buy some flowers for her mother. And kinda coaxed me into it as well. I thought, what the heck, my mother anyway likes flowers, no harm in taking some home (irrespective of what day it was). So I took some  gerberas and went home. The look on my mother’s face when I gave her those is something I’ll always cherish. It was such a tiny gesture on my part, but made a whole load of difference to her! So the next year (now that I’d set an implicit expectation and you know how hard it is to escape these from moms!!) I gave her something…I don’t remember what though. And this continued (except for the times I wasn’t in town during Mother’s Day). Today, being Mother’s day, I got her a bunch of baby pink gerberas and three different potted flowering plants (she loves plants…anything to do with her garden). Boy, was she thrilled or what, with the plants! Worth it, eh?

I don’t think my mom feels happy about this because it is Mother’s Day. I think it just gives her a lot of satisfaction to know that her offspring (who’s quite lost usually) took some time to do a thoughtful gesture. It never amazes me how she can have the capapcity to feel unbridled joy about trivial things I do. I don’t understand this…she does innumerable thoughtful gestures on a daily basis which are taken for granted almost all the times, and I do like twelve a year??? How can there be such a disparity? That’s why she’s mom and I’m daughter I suppose!

God’s in the details after all…

 

Having a friend around

Especially a friend you haven’t seen in a long time. A friend who’s come visiting after a stint in another country. One of the things I personally feel that speaks volumes about your friendship is the ability to take things forward from where you left off last time. Like as if there was no interim period. Like you’d just concluded a conversation yesterday and picked up on it today. That feeling of coming home. Of being warm and comfortable, being yourself and acting stupid (if you can’t behave stupidly with your friends, with whom will you?). I had a super time…catching up on things, spending time and generally having fun! Thank you my friend for dropping by…thank you for saying you care. It means a lot. Appreciate it…

Anddddd I got these yummy chocolate Swiss knifes to eat…check them out, aren’t they something?

Wake me up!

The one invention that I absolutely detest is the alarm (be it an old fashinoed alarm clock, or the watch alarm or the awful mobile phone alarm). Don’t get me wrong, I love mornings. I just don’t want to be woken up before it gets all nice and bright and you have sunshine streaming in through the curtains. It’s an everyday struggle for me to wake up on time and get to work…I’m seriously working on convincing my boss to let me have flexible work timings. Get to office by 10 AM and get out by 7 PM. I’m happy, he’s happy and the work gets done. Except that it’s not easy to convince him. Not with a reason like…ummm…I just hate waking up to the alarm at 6 AM! I take my time with the newspaper, I don’t like being hurried into reading it. A refreshing bath and a well eaten breakfast…all this would make me all set to tackle the day. In contrast this is what my mornings are like…

1. Alarm rings (a shrill ring of course, are they always designed to make you jump and hate sound altogether?).

2. Alarm rings again, more loudly (now it almost sounds like a fire alarm)

3. I curse and look for it to shut it. It goes into the dreaded snooze mode (again something that wasn’t really necessary)

4. Rings again after 9 mins. I groan and shut it off again.

5. After a see-saw of about 40 mins of shutting it off and ringing, there’s no point sleeping, so I wake up. Sometimes, ‘coz I struggle to find it and shut it off, there are chances of the mobile falling down and breaking or me falling down to pick it up. Thankfully that doesn’t happen frequently. Not enough I have to wake up early, I also have to spend money on a new phone which maybe has a worse sounding alarm?? <Shudder>

6. I finally see the time. Nooooooo I’m already late by an hour. I will have to miss breakfast. Again. Or if I’m lucky I could have the same old breakfast in office (which I have been trying to avoid). And can’t read newspaper now.

7. Frantically run around like a headless chicken to get ready…oh no, shirt is not ironed…can’t find socks…my hair looks Medusa-like…spray not working…the usual drama…

8. Get out finally (hopefully haven’t forgotten any important papers or books) and wait for the bus. Why don’t I see the others? Have I missed the bus? Aaah here it is, the last bus. Get into it and in a few minutes (due to the constant breaking and moving of the bus), I get lulled into sleep. Ha! 

9. Reach office feeling groggy and irritable. I see the other women looking all prim n proper: not a hair out of place, fresh dewy look on the face, perfectly ironed clothes. How do they manage it? Do they also have the time to make fresh fruit juice and eat some 5-grain bread in the morning? Is the secret to all this, waking up early? I will scream if you say yes!

A mixed week

Three of my good friends have graduated to the so-called ultimate stage of being a woman. They have become mothers now. From being an infant themselves, to being schoolgirls, to being college hotshots, to being professionals, to being responsible and kind daughters, to being great wives and understanding daughters-in-law, they have now come a full circle. They have a baby of their own. They hold the entire responsiblity of another being. Wishing them all the happiness in their new role.

  One of my closest friends lost his father last weekend. They say nothing is more final than death. It’s the ultimate truth that we all push away ‘coz it’s too hard to face. What can you say that can bring solace? Nothing. Nothing at all. It’s an individual battle and has to be fought on your own. Taking each day at a time, literally. Time doesn’t heal, but definitely helps in moving on to concentrate on other things that have sprung up…but it will still remain an open wound whose pain can strike you anytime, anywhere…

They say “Death is not the greatest loss in life; the greatest loss is what dies in you when you are alive”.

Life and Death…the ultimate joy and the ultimate sorrow…if death is reality, is life just an illusion?

Being negative

Ever noticed how a person’s negative attitude rubs off on you if you spend too much time with them? Agreed, you’re a cheerful person, but having somebody around you who almost incessantly cribs about situations, who always somehow misinterprets what people do. Who’s just bent upon making you see the wrong side of things! Though you might like the person, this one particular attitude can be such a turn off. Especially at the workplace. Feeling helpless and negative is really not something you want to be. I wonder what drives people to spread this feeling. Maybe they just can’t help it. Is it because there is no other vent for this but to throw it on all the people around you? The problem is, it has the annoying ability to trickle down and get into you.Sigh…I wish such people get miraculous solutions to their frustrations…’coz it’s not nice to spread this feeling around! An awful thing to catch…thankfully I’m moving away from that atmosphere, so I’m saved…phew! Long live optimisn, hope and positive energy

This is why I like it here…

Being in India I mean, as compared to being elsewhere. Small things which, for me, make a big difference. Of course, not counting the fact that home is afterall home. I loved being in the US for the little while I was there, but I missed some key things (no, not family and food, they are the obvious ones).  Stuff that make living simpler here (at least for me).

Like having a maid servant who can take care of cleaning the house and maybe even help around in buying groceries when you’re ill. At least my mom’s maid servant does it (My maid servant, well, that’s another story altogether. She has this record with herself every single day. She has to finish up brooming and mopping in flat 7 minutes, or else she her food doesn’t digest!). Like having a cook if you need to…who you can train to cook like how you want her to or atleast help with the cooking (cutting veggies n all that), so you can just waltz in and give the finishing touches!! Having the ‘iron’ fellow…uhh…I mean the guy who irons clothes for a living. One thing I absolutely detest doing is ironing my clothes. I loathe the task. Having this ‘iron’ guy around is a blessing. And you’ll most certianly find one, if not in your road, in the next one. For sure. There used to be a time when I lived with my parents, the maid servant would wash the clothes (my mother doesn’t believe in a washing machine) and once dried, she would take them to get them ironed. I didn’t even have to tell her which ones to take…she knew it! That’s the best part about living here…having help to make life simpler and easier. Even gardeners, plumbers, electricians, carpenters are all just a conversation away. Speak to your neighbour or your maidservant, or even the local grocer and next day you’ll have the required person ringing your door bell.

 There’s no way you can get all this abroad, unless you’re really rich. Middle class families can’t expect to live like how middle class here does with all the help around. Of course money is a part of this, but here I feel it’s more about relationships. My mother’s maidservant knows my entire family. We know her family, we’re the ones she comes to in case of any monetary need. We help in her childrens’ education. If she goes to her village, she brings along some fresh vegetables and fruits grown in her agriculture land. My mother’s office driver (her office has these 2 drivers that cater to the enitre office) knows all the houses of our relatives, he can drop anyone anywhere without any of us being in the car! We in turn know his family too…he comes home to give sweets on a festival! My mother-in-law has these 2-3 office boys who gladly do her small time work (delivering  or picking up things from one place to another). My friends, my husband they know their car and bike mechanics so well that if they need a quote for a car, or if they need some servicing, or they need some help with their vehicles, all they have to do is just call the mechanic. Everything will eb taken care of. If they need to buy a used car, they tell him, and he finds one for them or directs them to someone who can find one for them. No online searching. Of course this whole ‘do everything online’ is catching up here and how. It’s great in some areas (like paying your bills n all that) but for others, I think a personal touch is what makes it work.

And having all these people around is soooooooo nice. You don’t even have to be rich to get all this…You have to just be genuinely nice, respect them, help them, treat them kindly and of course pay them without questions. A whole network of symbiotic relationships. It works and keeps everyone happy. And most importantly it saves time…so that you can spend it doing what you’d really want to do. Compare this to how you have to live elsewhere. You clean, you drive, you fix things, you just about do everything yourself. The shelves of the stores are filled with DIY kits. Well, it is nice to do things on your own, but in this world of less time, you need all the help you can get, atleast on the week days That’s why I love it here, despite all its problems, India is…still a personal place.

Reminiscing over a song

A normal morning except I heard someone’s mobile phone ring in a particular tune. Instrumental. Soft. Known. Beckoning. Took me back to a time when I loved that song to bits. I still do, just that the intensity of those times is missing. Just like life, just like love. When there’s no intensity, it fades and remains either as a dull ache in the back of your mind or a dull memory. However you choose it. I’m digressing. Coming back to the song…usually I like songs purely for the reason they’re composed. It sounds good. Lyrics come next. This particular song however is in a language I don’t understand. A long lost friend of mine introduced me to the song and I remember having wonderful times listening to it time and again. For some reason, this song miraculously played itself (coincidence or was it?) whenever we were having either a good time or after we’d finished fighting! So this song for me is attached to those memories. Like a beacon, it leads me back to those days…the conversations, the laughter, the arguments, the tears, the easy camaraderie, the playfulness, the lies, the comfort, the intensity, the anger…a whole gamut of emotions that encompass a turbulent relationship. That can never come alive again, except in my mind. As it did today. Vividly. Each detail being etched out. Images moving around. It went so far as to make me remember some of the exact conversations we had whilst this was playing in the background. Sent a shiver down my spine. It’s eerie sometimes how you can recall every minute detail like it happened yesterday and be stuck with some glaring memory lapses at times…

A bar fight

Until last weekend, I’d only heard of people (guys mainly) getting into bar fights. And seen enough and more instances of it in movies and on TV shows. I’d never been a witness to such a fight, let alone being a part of it!

So, we were in this rather reputed old time bar last weekend. One of the few places we still frequent ‘coz it hasn’t changed and become like the new ones which are only filled with 18-somethings gyrating away to glory to some hip hop or trance. This was an old fashioned bar that played rock music (which we all love), where you can sit together and still manage to have a conversation amidst all the din around. Lately, even this place has become overcrowded (like every other place in Bangalore…sometimes I think having your friends home is the best option instead of going out).

We were a bunch of 8 (3 guys and 5 girls). Almost finishing up, ready to go. We had noticed a group of 5 hefty guys come in and take the table next to us. The creepy kinda guys. They kept staring at us girls, through out that time. But we all ignored it. They were even passing lewd comments. So my friend exchanged places with another friend (‘coz some of the comments were directly hurled at her). Now this guy (we’ll call him X) is a lil hot headed. Especially when provoked.  One of the guys in that group asked him what his problem was. X was taken aback. He hadn’t said a word (though he’d have wanted to give them a piece of his mind). Plus he was sitting in an angle facing all of us. So he replied to him saying just continue drinking your beer peacefully. Then another guy from that group came up to X and put one arm around him and said something. That’s it. One minute we were all having a great time, next minute all hell breaks loose. X and that guy had a loud altercation. And hit each other. Toppled a table. All in a split second. The choicest abuses were flying. We all tried restraining X from continuing the fight, but he fought us too (notice how strong people become when they’re angry? It’s so difficult to hold them down physically). The bar management intervened. We all tried making peace. I even saw one of guys lift a big beer mug ready to smash it. Now that was terribly scary. The whole pub was standing now and looking at all this. We finally managed to get out of there before it turned more violent ‘coz it looked like those 5 guys were so ready to continue this. Our boys (the three of them together) would have been no match for those guys. They would have gotten beaten, I’m sure.

 Is anger so difficult to control? Are physical fights enjoyable on some level? Those guys really looked like they wouldn’t mind having a full fledged fight. And each sentence either party said just added more fuel to the fire. All day people use expletives (without a second thought to what it might actually mean), but when a stranger uses it on you (especially who you’re having a fight with), it’s just an invitation to increase the intensity of the fight ‘coz they tend to intrepret the expletive literally. It’s like feeding off each abuse thrown. Makes you want to abuse more. Blind anger. You just want to hit someone and release the anger within you.

I’m just glad nothing serious happened to all of us that night (especially to X). I’m glad those guys didn’t follow us outside and try and do something. It was quite possible. Thankfully it stopped there. Phew!